Thursday, March 21, 2013

Hens, cocks, dogs, bitches and humans !


It is well established fact that human beings are social animal and we do share our DNA with most of our relatives in kingdom animalia. Well knock off biology and lets try to understand how the world would have been if hens, cocks and dogs could think like we humans do!

The very first thing all these animals would have done is that to make a religion. Make sure all of them have God or Gods.

 In the intelligent world of roosters (I m using better word :D ) and hens, the biggest looser would have been roosters. The hens would have surely formed a ‘’Prevention of atrocities against hen’’. The gestapo (hens living in cages) that human beings have created against them would have surely led to great embarrassment to human being as the case would have out rightly won by hens under Geneva convention. Just think how the hens would have felt, they are raped by cocks and are forced to lay eggs and eventually both eggs and hens are eaten by humans! The centuries of atrocities should come to an end!
The very first thing in their demand would have contraceptives and that to female contraceptives after all it is they who lay eggs. Those hens trading their body for eggs would have been socially boycotted. They could have been branded as ‘’Pro Human’’.  Nevertheless an agreement would have been signed between Humans and hens to dodge off such deadlocks.

In the kingdom of dog certainly there would have been turmoil. The ‘’World Bitch Association’’, a leading Bitch body to protect the rights of bitches, would have asked humans to stop using the phrase ‘’Son of a bitch’’ after all puppies have the right to live dignified life. On behalf of humans Uncle Sam would have signed not to use such abusive language. Moreover the Arab world and people in India would strongly oppose the public display of affection among dogs and bitches which is always beyond holding hands.
Scantily dressed girls (PETA) which most men enjoy would have been out of business. All of a sudden there would have been no chance for flop actress to come to lime light. Seriously till today I could not understand how female actors without wearing clothes can stop atrocities against animals!

Moreover, in such world we would have different worship places for different species and among them also people/animal divided on dissimilar faiths. Each satisfying their idiosyncrasies and claiming theirs is superior.  Secularism would have been redefined.  

3 comments:

  1. The Concept of secularism coming down in the end from an unusual title is really a good one. Thumps up. Hoping to see more of your writings sir.

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  2. A creative and clever writeup with rib tickling humor and an important message... keep it up, bhai :)

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  3. A very cleverly written take...Religion is indeed the most likely consequence of the ability to think...Enjoyed it but I fwelt it could have been long...Well, I guess great things come in small packages!

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